Say the magic words to me.

I'm so damn freaking depressed right now.

Is there anyone who can just stay by my side; hear my story, give a pat on my head and say " It's OK girl, every thing's gonna be fine, alright. Give others some time and give yourself some time to think and it will be just as fine.. =)". Without expecting any returns?

That is all i longing now, I also want people to understand me, doted me and pamper me. Just this time round will do.

Is that all you can think about me?

Like a ROBOT? Adapt to another environment just in a snap of fingers?

Sorry. Sad to say, I'm not that heartless.

"Don't say you love me, you don't even know me. If you really want me then give me some time.." -Such a meaningful song I realised.

If that's what i really am, being like such unreasonable and bimbo to you in that sense, then it's definitely pointless like you said.

Life is mine. It's my way of leading it to be happy to enjoy life, not to hurt myself by leading it to the way you want it to be. Same thing, u lead your life and as long as it doesn't affect others' thinking and action, you can be as good you are.

Oh god, I'm so devastated. Please help me get out of this painful experience.

I'm stuck..!

Thanks guys. It's very heart-warmthing to know that actually there's many of my friends around me notice that i'm in a very depressed and helpless situation.
So many sms-es from many long-lost friend suddenly appeared in my handphone screen.
I'm real thankful for being there consoling me when I was down. Thanks.!
But surprising, it's all the boys! Eh.. what bout the girls?!! Hello ? Now I know why i had more male than females friends =.=" hahaa, just joking.

What's in me?

Don't know what am I doing, don't know what am I saying also.

Simply don't know what's with me.

A selfish and no brainy girl? PROBABLY.

'Cause I really thinks that I have no brain to think properly and sort things out nicely.

I'm such a fuking loser!!

Maybe time will tell me what's wrong and what's right.

If it really do, I'LL WAIT.....!

*I'M SORRY!*

I'M SO SORRY, I DONT KNOW WHAT TO SAY MORE.! I'VE BEEN REPEATING ALL THIS SHIT ZILLION TIMES, I KNOW.

BUT I REALLY CANT EXPRESS OR DESCRIBE MY FEELINGS =((

CAN YOU DONT GO? I KNOW I'M SELFISH BUT, CAN YOU JUST DONT GO?

This was wad he said to me

Hey Wendy, in case you were wondering, I was waiting outside school for you today at 5pm that's why i asked. quite dumb cos you didnt even go school, but the time spent waiting gave me alot to think about.

I think you will probably never understand how I feel for you, nor will you ever realise how sincere & true my feelings are for you. You're probably even wondering how I can fall in love with you in such a short period of time. I don't know either.

After all, I told myself that I will not fall in love again after my ex girlfriend, because most girls simply aren't worth the heartache. From then till now, so many other girls have came along, but none of them ever came close to making me attach emotions on them.

You're the only one who made me fall in love, the only girl who made me cry for, and the only girl who made me do anything for you so willingly. I was even willing to let you go, as long as you were gonna be happier if I did.

Remember what I said? I said that if he keeps his promise to treat you better, and you'll be happy forever after, even if it meant that I can't contact you anymore, I was willing to do so. I was contented just watching over you from afar, and contented just knowing that you'll will think of me once in a while. I also don't know how I'm able to think like that for the first time in my life, becos I've always been selfish and never willing to give up the girl I love to another guy.

Since u came into my life, you've made me really happy. All the times we spent together, irregardless of how shortlived they were, I will hold near to my heart for the rest of my life. I will never ever regret knowing you, and I will never ever regret falling in love with you. If time could turn back, I'll do it all over again.

The only thing I'll ever regret for the rest of my life is not being able to make you my baby and introduce you to my family as my girlfriend.

I really wanted to treat you the way you to deserve to be treated, take care of you, protect you and make you the happiest girl on earth. But I guess it's not possible anymore. But I'm still glad we met, because you made me understand what it means to let someone go if you really love her. And even if I am to you just another insignificant guy that you'll forget sooner or later, you'll however always have a place in my heart, a place just for you and no one else.

I won't bother you anymore from now onwards. But I'll still be here if you needed someone. I've already decided to go to England and not come back. Guess that's what I ought to do to make things easier for you.

But you were the only one who ever made me think of not going. I must have been crazy. But if I ever had a choice, I'll choose you without hesitation. And when I'm over there, I will always keep a photo of us in my wallet, at least whenever I'm lonely abroad, I can look at it and remember the laughs we had, the things we did together, getting caught by the police together, sitting by the beach together, how beautiful you looked when you were singing at the playground, your massage, your smile..everything. Remember last night when I said I'll still remember you after 3 yrs? I meant it, cos I'm not the kinda guy who just forgets so easily.

So from the bottom of my broken heart, I wish you happiness. And I'll miss you, always.

Love,Brandon

I'm sorry if you dint wan the msg to be posted up here, but i really don't know what to say to you, one always so caring ;one always in my mind.

This is the toughiest choice i had to make in my life. Any choice will somehow hurt anyone of us.

Nobody can understand my feelings, in such situation i rather have a peace of mind; don't wanna think of anything but time seems to be pushing me hard to a corner; to choose an answer.

Poof! Gone!

Everything comes to an end...

I guess is what that can never change anymore.

It's too late..

I chose to be alone, don't wanna think about others.

What am I suppose to do?

Both decision hurts , I get the hurt too.

(Hello? I'm human too; flesh, blood and feelings too)

The back of my hand and the front of my hand; both flesh =both hurt

(Which part would you want me to stab with a knife? You answer me?!)

Who will really understand my feelings now? Anyone consider for me or just bloody wanna get/ win me over and that's it?

You tell me to choose, by right I shouldn't even think other else but I've been so hurt, since then, I start to ask myself " Will this relationship goes on just like this or what? Will there be second, third or even fourth time I getting the same old mistake done by you and must I accept what ever shit u gave me?"

Though I can forgive but never will I forget everything.

'Til now everything still seems so clear in my mind; the images

I can truly say I'm still happy being with you.

We shared so much things together, hobbies ,interest , characters and thoughts.

Never will i find someone else better suits me than you do.

Do you think it's easy for me to let go? NO!

You must imagine how much things I've been thinking and overcome to make this damn fuking choice?!

I sincerely love you plenty but I rather don't be with you.

It's another kind of feeling which you can never understand.

Being with a person and love a person is so much different.

How you want me to express my feeling which you can't even feel exactly the same way I do.

Blaming me and saying me heartless is all that you say.

Do you think I'm really that heartless?! There must be a reason I love you but why I dun wanna be with you.

Being with you there's far too much of disagreement and always leads to quarrel.

All I can say is " Dui Bu Qi, Wo AI Ni "

*I'll remember you*

It has been so long since we have talked
I hope that things are still the same
hoping they will never change
cause what we had can't be replaced
don't let our memories fade away
keep me in your heart for always

You made me believe
that I can do almost anything
stood right by methrough the tears through everything
I'll remember you,and baby that's forever true
you're the one that I'll always miss
never thought it would feel like this
I'll be there for you,no matter what you're goin' throughin my heart you'll always be, forever baby

I'll remember you
I promise you I won't forget the times we shared, the tears we cried
You'll always be the sun in my sky
It may be fate that brings us back to meet again someday
Even though we go separate ways

You made me believe
that I can do almost anything
You stood right by me
through the tears through everything

I'll remember you,and baby that's forever true
you're the one that I'll always miss
never thought it would feel like this
I'll be there for you,no matter what your goin' throughin my heart you'll always be, forever baby
I'll remember you
If the day should come when you need someone(you know that i'll follow)

I will be there
Don't ever let there
be a doubt in your mind'cause

I'll remember you,
I'll remember you,and baby that's forever true
you're the one that I'll always miss
never thought it would feel like this

I'll be there for you,no matter what your goin' throughin my heart you'll always be, forever baby
I'll remember you
Forever baby, I'll remember you

Cosmoprof model for my friend

Today went to Cosmoprof at Paradiz centre to modelling for a friend, Wei Li.

She's taking Cosmoprof makeup course and she need model for her portfolio, and so I was asked for doing her favour.

It's was quite fun throughout the whole session as you can see lots and lots of different students over there do all kinds of makeup; Fashion, Bridal, Wa-yang, Traditional Japanese, Cosplay...etc


As for me, you can see from the above pictures, It's fashion makeup. We have photo shooting of the makeup by a professional photographer after my friend completed the makeup.

This was my second time helping out a friend study in Cosmoprof, the first time was also fashion makeup but by another friend, Vanessa.

Will update the pics when they send me the pics, alright so now be patience =(

It's was so coincidence too when I saw the little gal whereby my auntie used to taken care off when she was a baby to kinder garden. *She's the one in the Opera makeup.

In my own opinion, I really like the makeup, Weili. I think it was real nice, especially the body art. It's very artistic I would say.

OK guys, I'll stop here. Done with my updates. *Hmm, I feel so sleepy..*

Goodnight everyone ! =D Sweet dreams to me and same to you guys =))

*miss u* Muwacch*

Simply Cam-Whoring =.="

Here's some uploaded pics of me recently, as for requested by the reader.

Basically, you can see that I've pretty nothing better to do than cam-whoring. Anyway, it's been some time since I last taken any pictures.

Kinda busy with my school thingy and also all sort of assignments and projects are coming up, not really have much time for blogging.

Tml going to help out my friend by being her model for her portfolio on her makeup course.

*Hmm* Wondering how will it be like? My friend told me she will be doing Fashion makeup on me and also the topic colour is RED. Actually, I dint really like red that much cos it always doesn't suits me well. * I had a tanned skin ,you see.*

Gotta sleep early as well, or else I'll be looking more like a ghost than a model.
And that will certainly affects my friend's portfolio, isn't it?

Guess I'm right, sleep all I want. Hopefully it do helps for my skin.


Ok, write less. Let us just head to bed now!! *Goodnight everyone =))*

*Muuwachhs =*

My New Hello Kitty Organizer !!

Yea..!! Finally bought my idea organizer alrdy.

Thanks to my dearie friend, Hoonie.
She's the one who gave me the informations of the whereabouts of the place to buy this lovely organizer.


It's quite expensive, $39.95 for a organizer but i thought it would be quite worthy la *(take a look at the features inside)

So cute.! At the back of the organizer, there's a zipper where you can put ya stuffs or , like me; stickers behind.


Actually, in the first place, I dint really like Hello Kitty. Previously, I thought that Hello Kitty is just a Japanese animated Kitty with no mouths, =x laughs.


Why it is attracted to so many people? Especially the period whereby Macdonalds was having their promotions abt the Limited Edition of different clothing/season of Hello Kitty and Dear Daniel, there's even riots happened just because of the Kitty..

UNTIL...

Suddenly one day, I saw my sister bought soooO many Hello Kitty stuffs in her cupboard and started collecting Hello Kitty stuffs...

My one of the good friend in Beauty Therapy course, Liyong. We went out shopping and pass our time during school breaks, she has a fetish over Hello Kitty stuffs too. If there's Hello Kitty related things, she would stop by and take a look..

Some how before i know, I'm attracted to HELLO KITTY !! I realised that when there's a place/shop has Hello Kitty stuffs, I will be attracted and go in the place/shop AUTOMATICALLY !! laughs =D

Soon, I HAD FETISH OVER THE CUTE LITTLE KITTY !! AHHH !!

And that's when started Hello Kitty and Wendy !!!

And nevertheless, I just simply love my Hello Kitty organizer !!

I want to be SNOWHITE!!

*Browsing thru my friends blog and some friendster pictures.*

I find it's very fortunate for some girls that they have such FAIR and CLEAR skin.

Sometimes you may also find them sort of glowing in the pics they've taken.

*Aww*, how envy* I wish that i dint go for a tanned in the first place, and now I've regretted!

It's getting tougher and tougher for me to become fairer. =(

When you are fairer, most makeup looks nicer on you and most clothes you wear makes you looks more attractive and stands out.

Well, it's not that we always likes to compare but however, we can say that it's more a natural way which human beings would always react in changes.

Thou, I'm a inner dark skin person but before the intensive tanning, i was actually considered quite fair le but now, worse come to worse I'm even darker each single day. (due to the hot sun recently it becomes)

I was like a Malay or an Indian beside all my Chinese friends which makes me feel so upset when we were taking photos together.

I've been trying lots of ways to make myself fairer and all doesn't work much.

Did anyone have a better idea or a useful way can make one become fairer? Teach me please *ARHH*

I'm dying for help......

School Starts..

Finally, the school eventually starts..

The first day I start school, I was nervous wondering what would my friends look like and be like.

I told myself "No matter what it just school and I'm here for school not any other thing else."

When I open the back door*(Hopefully I'm not late) ,walk toward to nearest seat and faster take a seat.

Luckily teacher wasn't there yet and then, I take a peep at everyone from the back. *There's unfortunately only 5 girls included me out of a class of 20 =.=

Due to my sociable character *Ahem Ahem* Hees,

I got to know friends in the first day.

They are in my group members, which consists the 5 of us from 3 different races.

For Malay, we called him 'In' *as in short form*

For Indian, he want us to address him as 'Jay'

And last but not least, for Chinese, That will be Venda,Brendon and me.

The first lesson is PC lesson. *Business Communication*

The Professional Cert course before we take our Dip.

As for the Second day, Brendon and I meet up for school. *Queenstown* Cos Venda said she will be waiting for us at the school gate where the others will be going by bike or etc.

Today i start a new topic, which is POA. =.=

In my secondary days, i dint choose the subject and now in business management i need to study about it.

If i choose POA in my secondary school life, wouldn't it be easier and faster and maybe i need not have to study my Professional Cert now, skip straight to Dip Cert =(

Some more, I'm very blur person so it's better to meet up with some classmate and go together.

My schedule is very weird but some of my classmates prefer it in this way as in we spend more lesson in Douby Ghaut than Queenstown. Queenstown only 2 Tuesday we'll be going.

So maybe better for me too.. It's nearer anyway.

Alright I'll stop here regarding school things,anyway it's kinda boring to post that too. Nth to say...

My fav..

My AVERINE (Earth tone) eyeshadow colour.. $58

My AVERINE *new* blusher (sweet pink).. $36

One of my fav parfum 'Dior Addict 2'.. $81

I bought both of my fav makeup at workplace.

AVERINE 's make up is very good for skin. It's under Dermalogical's brand, for those who always follow-up for a facial treatments should know this brand.

As for AVERINE, it's a very natural cosmetics.

It's also very good for those who had very acne skin or sensitive skin because the ingredients inside are all from plants' pigments and insects' colour pigment. Of cause it's definitely safe and dermalogistic tested, also best recommended by doctors for those sensitive skin.

However, due to the special ingredients they used, it's not very cheap. Some can be compare to those Labels' brand price. The price is the same world wide..

As for me, i'm lucky that i work there so i got staff's discount whereby alot customer may wish to have but, they don't.

For parfum, Dior Addict 2 was kindly recommended by a lot of my friends.

It's fragrance is sweet in the high node but fresh in the fresh node.

It means sweet in the first smell but after that the smell turns to refreshing so it's one of the parfum that i will recommend too =D

Hair model for salon

This is my first outfit and hair style.. Love it!!

Second outfit and hairstyle.. Topic: Sweet, demure?

Simply love the highlightings of the hair..So colourful =D

hehe..Mandy's hair style, love her highlights too =))

*Fun poses 1, 2, 3..

Isn't she cute?! Purple Smeurf?!! =D

Today went for a hairstyle shooting for advertisement for a salon. (Mandy's mum's fren's salon =.=")

It was so fun! This was the first time i curl my hair, at least let me have the look of it whether to curl it in the future.

My current hair length is still too short for curl and my hair is too thin and little =((

However, there's time whereby we were left there rotted so we took some fun poses to entertain ourselves and also nevertheless, our crappy conversations o.0

The whole thing lasted our whole day from morning until 7pm++

So tired, after that headed back to baby's hse.

We took the same bus back.

On the journey ,we chatted and ate THE WORLD'S WORST 'ORH-TAH'.

Really eeks!! Yucks!! Taste like it's uncooked! Waste $$$